Fashionable Clothing and Conflict

In conflict, people that are involved have different goals that they would like to achieve. People in conflict usually pursue four different type of goals. These goals include Topic Goals, Relationship Goals, Identity Goals, and Process Goals. In a particular movie called, "The Devil Wears Prada," one particular scene demonstrates that the parties involved want very different things. The goals they are trying to achieve are topic goals, however, their goals are very different. In this clip, we see a brand new intern at a top fashion magazine, Andrea, as she and her new boss, Miranda, have a conflict over fashion.
View Clip Here:Miranda and the Cerulean Sweater
Miranda wants to keep her magazine at the top of the totem pole. She works very hard and very diligently to ensure that she has the best content in her magazine and that she is up to date on the world of fashion. She is smart and driven. Andrea, on the other hand, needed a job. Her goal in this situation is to work for Miranda to gain experience in the magazine industry. Andrea has no care or desire for fashion. The two women have very different topic goals as they want very different things. Their interaction results in the following conflict: Andrea believes that fashion and clothes is just, "stuff." This comment makes Miranda very angry. Miranda then defends her argument, that fashion is beyond "stuff" with facts from the fashion industry. The two women have different topic goals. In the end, however, Andrea sees that Miranda was correct in her statements about fashion being more than just stuff.

Escalatory Spirals And "The Big Bang Theory"

Escalatory Spirals is a particular kind of destructive conflict that requires interaction.  Defined by Wilmot and Hocker in Interpersonal Conflict, an escalatory spiral is a "relationship that circles around two or more damaging ends; the interaction becomes self-perpetuating." The example in the book shows two roommates involved in conflict. The conflict begins with a misunderstanding. As the conflict continues, thoughts and actions are occur as they would in an actual conflict. Beginning as good friends and ending with the destruction of the friendship, the escalatory spiral shows how conflict gets escalated by something small and leads to something very large. In the hit show, "The Big Bang Theory," Sheldon and Leonard and roommates, much similar to Brad and Steve in the example in the book. However, in the clip, Leonard is mad at Sheldon for reading a letter regarding an important conference of his and then throwing it away, deeming it meaningless. Leonard questions Sheldon as to why he threw his letter away. Sheldon retorts to Leonard with an insult. The situation escalates to find Sheldon throwing one last insult to Leonard and then walking away, leaving Leonard very angry and the conflict unresolved. The situation does involve direct conflict, however, it also involves, "hitting below the belt" tactics; damaging the other person where it hurts them the most. Although this conflict is not completely destructive to their friendship, it does put a notch in their belts, so to speak. As roommates, Sheldon and Leonard are friends however, over the course of the show, the two have been involved in many conflicts. Some of these conflicts are more serious than the others. Although the series is not over, I would hope that in the end of their conflicting relationship, they can remain friends rather than having their friendship destructed.
Video Clip: Sheldon And Leonard-Escalatory Spiral

Conflict is a Zoo!

When it comes to the subject of conflict, many human beings find it very difficult to deal with. In order to help deal with conflict or make sense of it, we often try to relate the conflict(s) we are involved in to something that we are familiar with. According to the text, Interpersonal Conflict by Wilmot and Hocker, we do this by using metaphors to create a "vivid, shorthand description of a complicated process." Something I found particularly interesting was the metaphor that related conflict to animal behavior. Depending on the conflict, some humans will associate the conflict they are involved in to something that animals would do in their habitats, and would not actually do as humans. Particularly, when referring conflict to a zoo, one would interpret the conflict to be filled with wild animals acting as if they were fighting for survival. When one thinks of a zoo, such things as wild animals, natural habitats or even feeding time. In relation to conflict, wild animals can refer to the people who are involved in conflict. They could be irrationally acting or speaking, thus making them "wild." Feeding time in relation to conflict could refer to one person involved in the conflict jumping down another persons throat attacking them with assaults rather than constructively talking about the conflict at hand. One particular example that came to mind when I read about the animal like metaphor was the movie "Mean Girls." I found a clip the demonstrates the animal like conflict previously discussed. In this clip, the main character, Kady Herron likes a boy named Aaron. Aaron is dating Kady's friend, Regina. Regina knows that Kady likes Aaron. Regina does not really like Aaron, but is merely using Aaron as a tool to hold power over Kady. If Kady were to date Aaron, Regina would no longer be the most popular girl in school. Kady does not care about popularity, (at least not at this point in the movie,) and sincerely like Aaron. The conflict arises because Regina cannot lose her position as the most popular girl in school, but Kady just wants to date Aaron. The two girls have different goals that they want to achieve. And they are facing interference from others in trying to achieve their goals.In the video clip, Kady approaches the lunch table where Regina and Aaron sit. In order to get a rise out of Katy, Regina hits on Aaron simply to make her jealous. Katy then imagines how this situation would be handled if they were in the animal world, (Kady grew up in the wilderness.) Watch video clip here: Mean Girls-Zoo
After watching the clip, it is clear that the two girls have very different goals. However, after daydreaming about attacking Regina, Katy comes back to reality and succumbs to the bullying of Regina by agreeing with a statement that she makes. Regina holds power over Katy. Katy has the goal of dating Aaron; Regina has the goal of being the most popular girl in school. Because these goals are different, the conflict arises and causes the girls to treat the conflict by behaving like animals.